If you’ve spent some time in France this summer and are now considering making a more permanent move, I feel you! Or maybe you’ve already taken the leap. Either way, it’s natural to want to navigate your new life smoothly. Based on my experience of living in France for the past 35 years, here are a few nuggets of wisdom that could guide you.
Get Involved with the Church
No matter your beliefs, hitting up church gatherings can be surprisingly beneficial. The folks who attend are typically warm and welcoming—they’re always looking to involve newcomers. You can enjoy the community spirit without getting lost in theological debates. Just slip out before the pilgrimage season to Lourdes, unless you’re up for the adventure there!
Embrace Sports
Try your hand at sports at any level! Take a cue from the likes of Jonny Wilkinson at Toulon or Jack Willis in Toulouse—both great examples of integration. Personally, I’ve found a fantastic community at rugby events and even local pétanque games. Speaking of pétanque, while it’s known for its fierce competitiveness, you’ll find that many older French players aren’t as tough as they seem. Just win a few times and enjoy the camaraderie—don’t try to cash in against the Eastern European champs; they’re really good!
Cycling Culture
Try to feign some interest in the Tour de France. Despite not being a fan myself (standing by the roadside to catch a glimpse is less thrilling than it seems), just go with the flow, especially when this huge event takes over summer conversations here. Brush up on facts about iconic mountain climbs and make sure to get Tadej Pogacar’s name right!
Know Some History
A solid grasp of French history can go a long way in your new life. For instance, knowing who Marshal Pétain was is crucial, and if Charles de Gaulle doesn’t ring a bell, you might need to do some reading.
Watch French TV
Just like anywhere else, TV shows are prime fodder for chat here. Not being clued in about popular series like The Voice or Koh-Lanta can lead to feeling left out. Get familiar with the music scene too—artists like Jul and Michel Sardou are top of mind for many. Just steer clear of criticizing Johnny Hallyday; his fans are very passionate!
Sarcastic Humor and Quotes
Understanding cultural references pays off here. For example, when they bring up “the madeleine of Proust,” they’re evoking nostalgia despite most folks having never read Proust. Feel free to toss around some classic quotes—you might just make it all up, and no one will call you on it!
Understanding Apéritifs
Apéritifs are a huge cultural pillar in France. Unlike just drinks before dinner, an apéritif doesn’t necessarily guarantee that a meal follows, making it an easygoing social interaction. Use these gatherings to mingle but be ready to exit if the conversation strays into awkward territory.
Dining Etiquette
Eating with folks here can feel a bit tricky at first. Dinner usually happens later than in the UK. If you’re invited, bring a small gift—not mums or chrysanthemums, as they symbolize death. Wait until your hosts are settled before you start eating, and keep your hands visible, avoiding the urge to hide them in your lap. Expect some meal chats around food as they can carry on endlessly!
The Formalities of France
For many British expats, the French formality in social settings is refreshing, but be warned; politeness can quickly shift to frankness, especially if the conversation takes a turn. Try to keep your thoughts on local customs—discretion can save you from some awkwardness!
Being British
Embrace your roots subtly—being proud of your British heritage will help you connect with the local culture. Just avoid extreme displays, like singing out loud when you’re out in a crowd during sports events. People welcome us precisely because we bring a unique flavor to their world.
Avoid Brexit Talk
Seriously, it’s best not to delve into discussions about Brexit or complex political topics—most French people are unaware or uninterested. Stick to engaging topics, particularly about the British royal family, as they capture a lot of French imaginations.
Don’t Underestimate Language
This point can’t be stressed enough: learn the language. If you want to dive into the French way of life rather than hanging out only in English-speaking circles, mastering more than just the basics is necessary. Talk about much larger issues to integrate fully—like politics or culinary interests.
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