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Health What's A Mixed-Weight Relationship & Why Does It Matter?

17:07  13 april  2018
17:07  13 april  2018 Source:   refinery29.com

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Do mixed - weight relationships deserve the same kind of attention as mixed-race or mixed-faith? A mixed - weight relationship is exactly what it sounds like: It ' s a relationship in which there' s a noticeable difference in body size between partners.

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As a plus size woman who's dated several thin women over my lifetime, I've found some comfort with the "mixed-weight relationship" label. But, not everyone feels the same way.

A mixed-weight relationship is exactly what it sounds like: It's a relationship in which there's a noticeable difference in body size between partners. While the term is often used to describe couples with one partner who's plus size and one who's straight size (meaning that they wouldn't be considered overweight), a mixed-weight relationship can be between two plus size people or two straight size people — what matters is the overall difference between their respective sizes.

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This is interesting! What ' s A Mixed - Weight Relationship & Why Does It Matter ?

“If people want to embrace the label of a ‘ mixed - weight ’ relationship then that is great and individuals should be free to do so,” adds Preston. “The reality is it doesn’t matter what size one, or both of the partners are in a couple. It only matters if they are happy together.”

Refinery29 © Photographed by Renell Medrano. Refinery29

For me, the term "mixed-weight" is simply a descriptor. But, for some, it's is a loaded term. In fact, activists like plus size blogger Georgina Horne and plus size fashion vlogger Alexandra Airene see labelling love between a larger person and a smaller person as just another way the world tells plus people that they don't belong.

"People who feel the need to say that a fat person who's with a thin person is in a whole separate category to people in relationships period... I think that's just stupid. We're in a relationship and that's that," body-positive fashion bloggerGloria Shuri Henry says in a video about mixed-weight relationships.

Henry is in a relationship that many people would consider mixed-weight, and while it's important for people to see relationships like her's, creating a separate category for those relationships could add to fetishisation, says Sarah Sapora, a body-positive activist who once did a sensual photoshoot to empower plus size women in their sexuality. Sapora would rather drop the label and help people see relationships between people of different sizes as normal relationships. "If we accept things as normal, we remove the fetish aspect and we just see people as people who love each other," she says.

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Why does height matter ? For a guy average in height and just working the day to day, finding a girl about their height or less might be comforting. It also helps them to define who they are and what place they hold, not just in the relationship , but also in society.

Yet, there's sometimes power in labels. For me, categorising my relationship as mixed-weight was one way to acknowledge that the differences between my ex and I informed how each of us experienced our relationship. It also gave me something to Google when I felt that my ex was subtly fat shaming me, and I didn't know if other people felt the same way.

While labels create categories, they also create opportunities for conversation, and conversation is sorely needed when only one person in a relationship is experiencing discrimination. Mixed-race couples have to consider privilege and oppression as it concerns their respective races. Mixed-faith couples will have cultural differences they'll have to work through in their relationships. And, mixed-weight couples, especially when one person is plus size and one is not, have to acknowledge microaggressions that plus size people experience.

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What is to be done ? Who will think of the children? Called a “ mixed - weight relationship ,” the term has popped up on social media again after a woman named Jenna Kutcher wrote on Instagram that someone wondered how she landed a guy as hot as her husband, given that she looks like this and

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Henry says in her video that people assume her husband is making her stay big or would no longer love her if she were to lose weight. All of that points to fetish. People assume that he loves her only because of her size, and not for her personality. That's just one of the issues mixed-weight couples will have to acknowledge and combat.

So, yes, it's important for people in these kinds of partnerships to recognise that their different experiences with weight will play a part in their relationship. But, it's important for people in any relationship to recognise their differences, Sapora says, whether the difference is that one person is plus size or that one person makes significantly more money. "We bring our own stories to the table in any partnership," she says. "When we have differences of any kind, they’ll come up in the context of a relationship developing. Being able to talk about any kind of difference without shame can only help two people grow closer and find common ground."

Some couples might still find comfort in calling themselves mixed-weight, because it gives them a starting point to talk about their differences. Others might avoid labelling their relationship mixed-weight because it feels like another layer of stigma. Ultimately, it's up to the people in the relationship to decide.

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What ’ s the story and why does it matter ? The law creates a mixed electoral system in which just over a third of parliamentarians in the upper and lower house are elected by first-past-the-post (FPTP) and two-thirds by proportional representation (PR) via party lists.

The point is that we all know what is important but—ironically—we tend to do the opposite. We are prisoners of cheerfully miserable cognitive dissonance. Relationships matter , not only in our personal life but also in our professional life.

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