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Family & Relationships Erika Ettin: Questions to ask on a first date

18:45  04 february  2020
18:45  04 february  2020 Source:   latimes.com

Erika Ettin: Being single is a valid choice

  Erika Ettin: Being single is a valid choice The actress Emma Watson brought attention to singledom, not simply by saying that she is happily single but by naming herself as "self-partnered." I have to tell you, the fact that I'm a dating coach aside, I love this. It acknowledges the fact that being single can be a choice - and a valid one at that. Too often, society puts undue pressure on people - particularly women - to find a partner. Too often, society puts undue pressure on people — particularly women — to find a partner. Anything short of that seems incomplete. I beg to differ. While most of my clients come to me wanting a partner, I truly believe that you need to be a complete person on your own first.

So many first date questions you'll never run out of things to talk about. Have a look and choose which questions will work best for you and your date. 107. Would you rather live full time in an RV or full time on a sailboat? 108. What would you do with the extra time if you never had to sleep?

by Erika Ettin . There are certainly no right or wrong questions to ask on a date , but the ones that have the most luck require more than a simple Dating is about both talking and listening. The date should be a give and take, with you asking some questions and your date asking some questions .

First dates are hard. There’s no denying that. From the endless supply of sweat that you didn’t know your body could actually make, to the awkward silences when you actually contemplate talking about how unseasonably cold it is outside, to the question of who pays the bill for that glass of red wine, first dates are often fairly anxiety-inducing. One thing that makes it even harder is not knowing the right questions to ask.

a close up of a persons feet: Here are good questions to ask on a first date.© Dreamstime/TNS/TNS Here are good questions to ask on a first date.

Now, we all hope that the conversation flows naturally on a first date, but inevitably, most of us will be stumped at some point or another. Rather than running off to the restroom to plot your next conversation topic (been there — it’s stressful), it’s a good idea to have a few questions in your back pocket just in case the humming of the heater doesn’t quite overpower the dreaded silence.

How to date in December

  How to date in December Now that Thanksgiving is behind us (is it possible that I'm still full?) and radios are playing Christmas music as if it's the only station in existence, it's time to think about this time of year when it comes to your dating life. In other words, has the "turkey drop" led to the Christmas jitters? While not the most reputable source, sometimes Urban Dictionary says it best: “Turkey dropping occurs in adult life where if you’re not in a great situation at Thanksgiving then you better get out then. If not, then you run into the problem of being a cad for dumping someone around Christmas, New Years, and Valentine’s day. And heaven forbid they have a birthday November-February too.

And if coming up with questions to ask your potentially future partner is a struggle, dating expert Erika Ettin has come to your rescue. It’s not the time to delve into your date ’s divorced, failed relationships or recent unemployment. Says Ettin , “Let’s see if you like each other first …

According to Erika Ettin , a dating coach and the founder of the dating site A Little Nudge, it's best to keep things light the first time you meet someone. Scroll down for seven "awkward" first - date questions you can ask to set up a more interesting conversation — provided you ask them right

There are certainly no right or wrong questions to ask on a date, but the ones that have the most luck require more than a simple one-word answer. You want to get the person thinking, showing them that you actually care. For example, rather than asking, “What do you do?” (perhaps the most boring question in the book), you could ask, “What made you decide to get into medicine?” or “How do you enjoy your job as a pediatrician? I imagine it must be very rewarding.” The first question allows your date to simply say, “I’m a doctor,” but the other two require a bit more thought and introspection, leading to a more thoughtful conversation … and perhaps a second date.

Erika Ettin: When is the best time to online date?

  Erika Ettin: When is the best time to online date? As we approach Thanksgiving and then the Christmas season (though, I'm already starting to hear Christmas music too soon!), I want to talk about whether there is a best time of year to do online dating or meet someone. People ask me the same question all the time: "Is there a best time of year to do online dating?" In short, the answer is no. I would first say that the best time for you to do online dating is when you’re emotionally ready and available for it. Remember that online dating takes time and energy, both the literal kind and the emotional kind.

How to Ask Better Questions on a First Date . Engaging in small talk with anyone can be a little nerve-racking — you’re on an improv stage for two, and have to Engaging in small talk on a first date can be especially anxiety-ridden. While unspoken, you’re being actively evaluated on your attractiveness

Going on your first date ? You NEED to be prepared. Knowing exactly what to ask will give you a BETTER chance of getting that 2nd date with the person you

Other questions that might come in handy:

— What do you generally like to do after work?

— What made you decide to move to the area, and do you enjoy it?

— How was your day? (Often overlooked, but a great conversation starter.)

— I’m just getting into podcasts and could use some recommendations. Do you have any?

Remember that this is a date, not an interview, so try to avoid acting like you’re judging the other person based on his or her answers. (Maybe you are, but keep that to yourself!) It’s best to stay away from the stereotypical interview questions like, “What is the hardest thing you’ve ever accomplished?” or “Tell me about a time where you were challenged to do something you felt was wrong?” These questions are scary, whether at an interview or a date. Don’t put the person on the spot. Rather, ask something that he or she already knows or can at least have a fun time thinking about.

Dating is about both talking and listening. The date should be a give and take, with you asking some questions and your date asking some questions. What you say is just as important as your ability to listen. And what will you be listening to? The answers to these fabulous questions you’ll ask!

Erika Ettin: Is it too cold to date?

  Erika Ettin: Is it too cold to date? "Oh, the weather outside is frightful but the fire is so delightful." And the dates? It's that time of year. The time when scarves and gloves become a priority. The time when you look out your window at 4 p.m., and it's already pitch black outside. When the weather sinks below 32 degrees, the thought of planning creative date ideas can be a bit daunting. Somehow the combination of sweatpants and Amazon Prime (Marvelous Mrs. Maisel anyone?) always want to have a say in the matter. But have no fear.

Use these 154 great first date questions to ignite fun, and unexpected conversations. This is the only list of first date questions you'll need! But it doesn’t have to be as long as you have some questions to ask on a first date memorized.

Erika Ettin , Founder of A Little Nudge. Photo Selection & Photography. "I worked with Erika on the Platinum Package, and to say that it was a successful experience would be an understatement. Holly and I are going on a trip to Italy and Spain this week, and my kids seem to want to spend more time

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(Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, where she helps others navigate the often intimidating world of online dating. Want to connect with Erika? Join her newsletter, eepurl.com/dpHcH

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©2020 Erika Ettin

Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.

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