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Food Ask The Salty Waitress: Is it wrong to expect my mega-rich friend to pay for dinner?

21:07  10 april  2018
21:07  10 april  2018 Source:   thetakeout.com

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  Ask The Salty Waitress: Should I tip in cash or on a card? Salty Waitress is The Takeout’s advice column from a real-life waitress that will teach you how not to behave like a garbage person while dining out—and maybe in real life. © Provided by Univision Interactive Media, Inc.

Dear Ms. Salty , One of my friends happens to be a wealthy executive of a multi-national corporation. The guy is loaded—upper-six figures rich . Look, there’s nothing wrong with this; I make a comfortable-enough living to pay for dinner .

Ask The Salty Waitress : Is it wrong to expect my mega - rich friend to pay for dinner ?

a person standing in front of a store© Graphic: Nicole Antonuccio

Salty Waitress is The Takeout’s advice column from a real-life waitress that will teach you how not to behave like a garbage person while dining out—and maybe in real life.

Dear Ms. Salty,

One of my friends happens to be a wealthy executive of a multi-national corporation. The guy is loaded—upper-six figures rich. When I first got to know him and we dined out, he would almost always pick up the tab. It would become this implicit thing — he would happily pay for the meal, $200 meant nothing to him, and everyone went home happy.

However, the last 4-5 times we dined out, he would be the one initiating the dinners, and it would often be at some high-priced place. And each time, he would nonchalantly say, “Let’s split this?”

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  Ask The Salty Waitress: Is it okay if I'm out with a group but don't want to order anything? Salty Waitress is The Takeout’s advice column from a real-life waitress that will teach you how not to behave like a garbage person while dining out—and maybe in real life. Dear Salty, If I’m with a group of three or more but am not hungry for whatever reason, is it okay to explain as much to the server and not order?- Seriously, I’m Just Not HungryDear Not Hungry,Even when I’m not actually hungry, I don’t know that I could ever summon the willpower not to order something. (I’m the insufferable queen of suggesting a split appetizer and then devouring 80 percent of it. Sorry.

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Dear Ms. Salty ,One of my friends happens to be a wealthy executive of a multi-national corporation. The guy is loaded—upper-six figures rich . Ask The Salty Waitress : If our food is taking forever, can we just pay for our drinks and leave?

Look, there’s nothing wrong with this; I make a comfortable-enough living to pay for dinner. I still enjoy dining out with him, every time. But yet, there’s a tiny voice in the back of my mind thinking: “You cheap bastard.” Should I feel guilty for even thinking like that?

Riding Coattails in Calgary

Dear Coattails,

Everyone should be lucky enough to have one rich friend—not too many, because then you become an insulated country club ratbag, but just one who sometimes lets you drive their Ferrari, swim in their heated pool, or eat out on their dime.

Asking to split the check among two adult friends isn’t wrong or impolite, even if the voice in your head says that he could wipe his ass with $100 and not notice. He’s not being rude by asking to split the bill, but the question is whether you’re wrong to wish he’d pick up the check again every once in a while.

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My friend Dana gifted me the book Jillian by Halle Butler , probably just so we could discuss it once I’d finished reading—which didn’t take long. Ask The Salty Waitress : Is it wrong to expect my mega - rich friend to pay for dinner ?

Ask The Salty Waitress : Is it wrong to expect my mega - rich friend to pay for dinner ? Could you homebrew beer in an Instant Pot?

Now that the Champagne train’s left the station, it’s time to think through why your friend’s behavior could have changed. Maybe something got shaken up in his personal finances? I don’t know what’s going on with mutual funds or petroleum futures, but is there a chance that he’s doing a bit of belt-tightening because of changes to his own financials? Best not to pry, but there could always be something going on that you don’t know about.

On that topic, does he think something’s changed with you? New job, new house, new million-dollar trust fund? Maybe he assumes that because you started ironing your shirts, you’ve really hit it big.

I understand your reaction, even if it etiquette says there’s nothing wrong with what he’s doing. Maybe splitting the check is a sort of litmus test he uses once he’s gotten to know someone and wants to make sure they’re not just using him as a meal ticket. Maybe he’s afraid the string of free meals will feel awkward for you. Or maybe he thinks “Hey, I’ve picked up the tab the last four dinners. When is Coattails in Calgary going to spring for the check?” (Look, I don’t know how rich people think, I’m just spitballing here.)

If you’re finding the dinners a bit rich for your blood, you could always suggest a less-pricey alternative. When it’s your turn to offer the invitation, skip the French spot with the wine vault in favor of something more casual. You didn’t mention how your friend orders when you go out—do you spend about the same amount on each of your meals, or is he a can-I-get-a-side-of-caviar type? If it’s the latter, then splitting the check could be slightly unfair.

Oh and if he starts picking up the tab again, feel free to invite your old friend Salty along to thank her for the swell advice.

Got a question about dining out etiquette? Or are you a server/bartender with a horror story the world needs to hear? Email us: [email protected].

Ask The Salty Waitress: How to handle it when diners fight over the bill .
Salty Waitress is The Takeout’s advice column from a real-life waitress that will teach you how not to behave like a garbage person while dining out—and maybe in real life. Congratulations, Salty readers. Because I received two questions that were related, you’re treated to a two-fer column today. Don’t skimp on the tip, sweetpeas.Hi Salty,I come from a pretty traditional Asian family which means it’s a big ol’ show over who gets to pay the check.

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